To binky, or not to binky - that is the question.

My son is winning the binky war.

He's taken a binky since the day we left the hospital, and man am I glad he did! It's soothing, it helps him sleep and it seems to comfort him during bouts of teething. Lately, however, I've been trying to limit binky time in an effort to encourage more speech and assure I won't have a five year old still addicted to the pacifier.

I was holding strong, ignoring requests for his favorite "treat" and instead rerouting him to new activities. Even during a teething bout I was able to keep him binky free for the majority of the day.

And then it happened.

With the teething bout, came the constant finger in the mouth. And with that constant finger in the mouth, he remembered the gagging reflex he had discovered months ago.

Some background: At around 10 months my son discovered his gag reflex. At first I panicked, wondering why my little baby had suddenly decided to shove his fingers down his throat until he gagged. Was his stomach upset? Was there something wrong with him? A quick trip to my favorite baby source - Google - revealed that this was a common stage that would pass. It suggested I ignore the behavior and said that once the sensation became old to him, he would give it up. The best explanation for the odd behavior was that my son had simply discovered a new feeling and he was exploring it.

After a week of trying my best to ignore the gagging, it finally stopped and I thought we had moved on.

Fast forward 5 months later, we're in the car driving to the gym - my husband, me and my son - and he's gagging himself in the back seat. This time, however, he threw up. Now I know I'm supposed to ignore this behavior - according to the "experts" who post on mom boards, but that's simply something I can not do when my son is making himself physically sick.

He looked surprised and I hoped he was as traumatized from the experience as I was and that it would be a one-and-done situation. Until that evening when he did it again. And then he began using utensils at meal time to do the same. Luckily, I found a solution. As soon as he starts trying to gag himself, I pop a binky in his mouth and he completely moves on.

I can't help but think he did this on purpose. That he saw me taking away his binky more than he thought was acceptable and as a result crafted a situation where I would inevitably give in to his wishes. He must have sat down in his playpen and crafted the entire plan in his head - asking himself, what would I have to do to convince my mom that a binky is better than the alternative? Which is when he inevitably came up with this plan, racking his brain for the moments I reacted most terrified.

So for now, my son has won the binky war. But he's right; it is better than the alternative.

Has anyone else's kid done this? I was surprised to learn the gagging was a normal developmental stage that I had somehow never heard of.

-N.

Slightly Crunchy: giving in to some of the earth-preserving, "granola-esque" qualities that are often associated with mothers such as cloth diapering, breastfeeding and organic baby food-making, but without fully embracing the "make-your-own-clothes-wear-organic-deodorant-all-natural-everything" lifestyle.